mental health awareness week Archives - Zoë Ross Psychotherapy

Wellbeing Wonder Number 4: Positive relationships

Today’s wellbeing wonder of people is a very important one, especially given that loneliness is on the increase, particularly amongst older people and can be very detrimental to mental health.

Being around people who love and support you is important for many reasons, including good wellbeing. Positive relationships are one of the cornerstones of the PERMA model from Martin Seligman (the father of positive psychology). His research suggests that pain centres in the brain are activated when we are lonely and, being the strong social creatures that we are, we flourish when we have strong, positive connections with others.

Are all relationships good?

Unfortunately, not all relationships are positive. There are manipulative and unhealthy relationships. There are unfortunately some people in the world who are critical, snarky and judgemental. Being around these types of people and the negative energy that they consistently give off can be very draining and it’s very hard to avoid getting dragged into their negative whirlpool. While it’s not always possible to rid them from your life completely, spending less time with this type of person and setting appropriate, healthy boundaries can be a great first step (though they may well complain about this too!).

The importance of positive relationships

Instead, cultivating healthy relationships with people who are more positive and energising to be with can really make a difference to your levels of happiness on a day to day basis. I’m not talking about people who are without the full range of emotions we all have as humans, and of course we all have our difficult and down days, but those authentic people who are genuinely supportive of you and your goals in life. They may well challenge you (and that’s a good thing), but it’s likely to be in helpful and encouraging ways rather than the negative naysayers, who are of course often hiding behind their own fears and projecting them on to you.

As you spend more time with positive people, of course you become more positive too and that’s when relationships of many types can truly flourish. Whether it’s a friendship, work, family or romantic relationship you can support each other in many different ways, whether it’s simply having a cracking good laugh, helping each other through a tricky time or working out how you will conquer the world.

It’s a very beautiful thing and a real wellbeing wonder.

Wellbeing Wonder Number 2: Sleep MHAW17

Sleep is one of those things that when you’re getting enough of it, you don’t even notice it, but when there’s an issue with it (as any new parent will tell you), it can dominate your life.

There seems to be a little bit of conflicting evidence about how much sleep you need…is it 8 hours or 10 hours or is Maggie Thatcher’s 4 hour’s enough for the macho ‘super busy’ amongst us? Well, it depends on you and by the time you reach a certain age, you know how much sleep you need to make you function properly. There is even some thought that women need more sleep owing to the complexity of our brains 😉

For me personally, sleep has magical restorative powers like nothing else and one of the reasons most of us feel so good on and after holidays is the extra sleep and rest we allow ourselves; like the little afternoon naps…

The power of the nap

You either love it or hate it and I’m a lover of a little afternoon nap. Indeed, I’ve got a little sunny napping corner in my house where it’s perfect to curl up for a 20 minute afternoon nap, but not quite comfortable enough to go for an all out sleep.

There’s plenty of evidence that an afternoon nap of around 20 minutes is great for your productivity and learning capacity. Winston Churchill apparently had an afternoon nap every day during the war, so if it’s good enough for Winston…!

Dealing with sleep issues

Unfortunately sometimes sleep becomes an issue and most of us have times where we are struggling with sleep. This can often be due to something stressful or worrying that’s happening in our lives and a changed sleep pattern is often one of the first signs something’s not quite right. You might struggle to get to sleep, or have a consistently disturbed sleep, wake up super early every day or indeed be sleeping far more than usual.

What’s worked for me at times like these is going back to sleep basics and trying to accept that it’s a phase that will most likely pass. And of course, trying to deal with whatever it is that is stressing or worrying you if the most helpful thing, though sometimes that’s easier said than done. So what are the basics of a good night’s sleep?

Sleep Basics

Create a calming atmosphere in your bedroom…piles of clothes, or unread books do not a soothing sleep-sanctuary make. You don’t have to make your bedroom into a pinterest-worthy zen-like space, but a bedroom that is calm and soothing is a good start.
Turn off your phone and laptop and television well before bed. Yes, we all know that blue light emissions don’t help with sleep, but how many of us actually turn them off the recommended 1 hour+ before bed? If you’re having sleep issues, it’s probably the first thing you should try.
Make a conscious effort to relax. It might be having a bath, doing a bit of yoga, or a trip to the gym followed by a sauna, but finding the way that you relax and unwind is an important part of ending the day and helping your brain to switch off.
Meditate – I’m a huge fan of meditation (more on that tomorrow) and simply focusing on your breath for a few minutes can be enough to calm a racing mind. There are plenty of apps and youtube sleep meditations – my favourite is the Andrew Johnson’s lovely soothing deep sleep app. There’s an irony of course in that your phone then has to be on…but you can put it somewhere you can’t reach it 🙂

You can read yesterday’s ‘wellbeing wonder’ post about exercise here.

Wellbeing Wonders: Mental Health Awareness Week

This week is once again mental health awareness week (where has the last year gone?!). Last year, I posted a post a day for mental health awareness week and this year I thought I would again.

This year’s focus is ‘survive or thrive’. It’s a really good choice of topic as for many people even without a recognisable mental health problem, they are simply surviving in their life, rather than truly thriving. Often this is due to stress – work, family, financial (or sometimes all three) and there are many people using self-medicating habits to just get through the day or week, rather than truly living a life they love.

Learning to thrive is the cornerstone of positive psychology and something I’ve really been focussing on my own life in the past year and a half. It’s not always been plain sailing but it always makes a difference when I refocus on the things that matter and get back to the ‘wellbeing wonders’ that have helped me to live a life I truly love and thrive. I thought it might be helpful to share them with you as a good reminder to us all!

Wellbeing Wonder Number 1: Move (lots).

We all know that exercise is good for us. There is overwhelming evidence that exercise has a positive impact not just on our bodies, but our minds too; the NHS recommends it for mild depression and research is showing that the benefits to a range of cognitive functions can be significant.

I’ve always thought I was fairly active (walking lots with the dogs and walking around school as a teacher), but to be honest I was kidding myself a bit really and it wasn’t until I really stepped it up that I noticed a huge difference in my wellbeing (both mental and physical).

I started going to the gym most days and, alongside walking in the fresh air (hint: getting outside is also a wellbeing wonder!), it’s now my go-to stress-busting activity and an everyday priority. I work, sleep and feel so much better after my morning exercise and generally go about my day with a spring in my step.

I definitely underestimated the impact until I had to take a break from it due to ill health and could feel myself less able to deal with the daily stresses of life. It felt so good to be back to the gym and I’ve recently taken up ‘running’ (the couch to 5k app is great if you are thinking of doing the same).

The sense of achievement you feel over time is also great for your wellbeing and of course there are the social benefits too; I’ve made some gorgeous friends at the gym and my new ‘running buddies’ are such a lovely, encouraging bunch.

So, my tip is to find something you love to do, and if you don’t know what that is, then try different things until you do!

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Why child mental health matters to us all & why schools are key

I thought I’d mark mental health awareness week by writing a blog post a day on a mental health topic. First up, a blog about child mental health.

“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men”. Fredrick Douglass (1855)

The above quote illustrates perfectly why child mental health matters to us all. The first signs of mental illness are usually seen in childhood or adolescence, with nearly half of all lifetime cases of mental illness starting by the age of 14. Early intervention at this stage can prevent more serious adult mental health issues developing.

So, it was disappointing to hear last week that despite the government pledging £1.25 billion to improving child mental health, they’ve axed the recently appointed School’s Mental Health Champion Natasha Devon, due to her expressing her views that the over-reliance on assessment was damaging to children’s mental health.

At least Child mental health is being discussed with increasing frequency in the media; The Times has been running an influential campaign based around the recommendations made by Professor Tanya Bryon and National Mental Health Week is receiving high profile coverage. National projects like HeadStart, have the potential to improve our understanding, but just how bad is the situation around child mental health and does it matter?

The statistics are out of date, but it doesn’t stop the need to talk about child mental health.

As pointed out in this blog post, the existing statistics around child mental health are well out of date – the last National study was over 12 years ago. Indeed the top recommendation by Tanya Bryon’s report is that the government commission a new survey, which they consulted for earlier this year – it will make interesting reading.

The youth mental health charity Young Minds gives the following stats which are rather sobering:
So, while the claim that “3 children in every classroom have a diagnosable mental health disorder” is misleading – is should at least say that the total figure equates to around 3 children in every classroom, the general message is clear – more children than we may realise have a mental health problem and this is confirmed by anecdotal evidence from child mental health professionals.

Talking to children helps

While we all have mental health issues at times in our lives. It’s when they turn into mental health problems and disorders, that there is an issue. 75% of mental health problems in adult life (not including dementia) start by the age of 18. Early intervention when a mental health issue starts to show prevents the personal, social and economic issues that mental health problems in adults and as Prince Harry stated at the opening of the Invictus Games this week, many mental health issues get better simply by talking.
As a society, finally we are getting more aware of mental health issues in general and campaigns such as Time to Talk and The Heads Together campaign fronted by William, Kate and Harry show that we are willing to discuss mental health and working to end the stigma around it. It should be no different for children.

So we can argue about the current statistics, but it doesn’t really matter. If as adults we can help children and adolescents feel better about themselves and prevent their normal feelings turning into a more serious mental health problem, then we really should. And talking to them is a really good place to start.

Schools can play a key role in child mental health

A tale of two schools

The first (enlightened) school I worked at as a teacher and Head of Year had a very caring pastoral team in place who were given significant time to deal with the wide range of issues that arose. The vast majority of the issues were to do with how pupils felt about things that had happened to them and encouraging them to talk, really listening to them and helping them come up with some possible ways forward really did make a difference.
There was a clear system for escalating issues where further intervention was needed and a school counsellor was in place long before it became de-rigour. And yes, it was a happy school. Pupils knew that staff would take time to talk to them and help. I have no evidence, but equally have no doubt, that this made a difference to pupils’ mental health and well-being.

It came as a real shock to my system when I moved schools and the pastoral support, let alone pupils’ mental health, was far down the list of priorities. Pupils were definitely not encouraged to talk to staff (and many staff sadly liked it that way). It was like a totally different world and, despite the fact that it was a more affluent and ‘successful’ school, there was a lot more stress and unhappiness amongst pupils and staff. Funnily enough, I left teaching soon afterwards.

Good teacher / pupil relationships are key

The whole school culture makes a difference and while teachers cannot be expected to be ‘mental health experts’, I’ll reiterate that many of the issues that children have can be helped simply by having someone listen to and talk to them. This is why schools are key as teachers are often seen as trusted adults and they do not have the same emotional ties as parents.

Such relationships are often easier to form in primary schools, perhaps as teachers develop deeper relationships with their pupils as they tend to see them every day, but all teachers have a role to play in simply being aware, noticing and raising possible concerns with more experienced or specialist colleagues. This article gives some excellent advice about talking to children about their feelings if you think there may be an issue.

Signs for teachers to look out for which indicate there may be a mental health problem include:

Withdrawal from social activity
Apathy or loss of interest in activities pupils usually enjoy
An usual drop in school attainment or functioning.
Problems concentrating or thinking
Illogical thinking
Uncharacteristic nervousness
Unusual or odd behaviour
Decline in personal care or changes to sleep and eating
Rapid mood changes

It is important to note that most children will exhibit one or more of these symptoms at some point in their lives – it just means they may need someone to talk to rather than being too quick to label them as having a ‘mental health problem’. But having someone to refer them in school to is a good first step.

Giving teachers mental health training

Giving some willing teachers in schools training in mental health, can help them to be more aware of mental health issues from a child’s perspective but also, and really just as importantly, recognise issues with their own or colleagues’ mental health…but that is another blog post

Courses such as the Mental Health First Aid training gives staff an overview of Mental Health issues and recommends steps they can take to promote mental well-being in their school. Staff who’ve had this training are then in a stronger position to help colleagues support students or to make referrals to professional services where necessary.

Referrals to professional services

Sadly, in February the NAHT found that two thirds of primary schools could not deal with mental health issues in their pupils effectively, feeling they lacked the resources needed. It’s always been difficult to get CAHMS referrals or access to an educational psychologist and CAHMS services have lost out to austerity cuts, although some would argue that schools do now have greater freedom with how they spend their budget, so getting in an Ed Psych or a school counsellor more regularly can be done.

Organisations such as Place2Be provide counsellors in schools to help to deal with pupils needing professional intervention. The government has pledged that every school should have access to a counsellor and are running a pilot to improve school’s access to CAMHS.

Such services are vital to help those young people for whom talking and supportive relationships are not enough. There is of course an irony that the government has cut the funding for such services at the same time as it pledges support for child and adolescent mental health. This of course places more pressure elsewhere and sadly it’s children who have mental health problems that suffer most. However, making sure all children have someone to talk to about their worries and concerns can make a difference and prevent them from developing into more serious mental health problems. And that’s what the best schools do without even thinking.

#MHAW16