Wellbeing Wonder Number 4: Positive relationships


Today’s wellbeing wonder of people is a very important one, especially given that loneliness is on the increase, particularly amongst older people and can be very detrimental to mental health.

Being around people who love and support you is important for many reasons, including good wellbeing. Positive relationships are one of the cornerstones of the PERMA model from Martin Seligman (the father of positive psychology). His research suggests that pain centres in the brain are activated when we are lonely and, being the strong social creatures that we are, we flourish when we have strong, positive connections with others.

Are all relationships good?

Unfortunately, not all relationships are positive. There are manipulative and unhealthy relationships. There are unfortunately some people in the world who are critical, snarky and judgemental. Being around these types of people and the negative energy that they consistently give off can be very draining and it’s very hard to avoid getting dragged into their negative whirlpool. While it’s not always possible to rid them from your life completely, spending less time with this type of person and setting appropriate, healthy boundaries can be a great first step (though they may well complain about this too!).

The importance of positive relationships

Instead, cultivating healthy relationships with people who are more positive and energising to be with can really make a difference to your levels of happiness on a day to day basis. I’m not talking about people who are without the full range of emotions we all have as humans, and of course we all have our difficult and down days, but those authentic people who are genuinely supportive of you and your goals in life. They may well challenge you (and that’s a good thing), but it’s likely to be in helpful and encouraging ways rather than the negative naysayers, who are of course often hiding behind their own fears and projecting them on to you.

As you spend more time with positive people, of course you become more positive too and that’s when relationships of many types can truly flourish. Whether it’s a friendship, work, family or romantic relationship you can support each other in many different ways, whether it’s simply having a cracking good laugh, helping each other through a tricky time or working out how you will conquer the world.

It’s a very beautiful thing and a real wellbeing wonder.


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